i want a lover i don't have to love i want a boy so drunk he doesnt talk

listening to bright eyes again <3
emo returns.

anyways. walking across campus last night on the way back from rehearsal i left a little bit after most so iw as walking by myself. I looked around at everything. The ground with snow still on it. The biting cold. The beautiful architecture of the mansion. The rock. The field. The library. The deer. I just took it all in. It really is a beautiful place. And I do appreciate the beauty of it all. But I don't know that its what I need. I can understand people like Amy who want suburbia and quiet and calm but I don't think I'm one of them. I need action and movement and a city where there is life breathing all the time. It really hit me a few days ago. I walked out of my building to make the 7 minute walk to Dreyfuss for rehearsal and everything was still. There were a few other people walking around but there was barely any sound. I need sound. I need noise. I need life around me, not just in myself. Not to say that there is no life in or around in suburbia but I feel like its just too quiet for me. I need to get out of this damn bubble!

Be a good girl
You've gotta try a little harder
That simply wasn't good enough
To make us proud

This whole waiting for an answer thing is killing me. By this time last year I had already known for 2 and a half weeks. I just want an answer so I can really plan on living in Philly next year. I really want to be in Philly. Manhattan would be wonderful but its out of the question. Far too expensive. But Philly isn't as bad- and its closer to home. And to friends. And to life. To everything. Philadelphia. I need it. <3