shit man...

its 2008.
when the fuck did that happen?

seriously.
time flies and i dont even notice it going until its so far past i'm thinkin its 4 weeks ago or something. i realize how little sense that makes but fuckit, i dont care. its 4:10 in the morning and therefore good enough for me and you.

so break just keeps moving right along.
and so do the good times with my friends.
we've drank and talked and driven (or ridden) and dinered and everything with more to come. i know its cliche but my friends from high school might be the best i'll ever have. we didn't have the times of our lives in h.s. and those were not the best days of our lives but we're still together and with each other now and times are getting better as we are getting older.

new years was calm, mostly uneventful but very drunk.
it was just amy, erin and i.
the three of us at my apartment drinking. than walking to the river for the fireworks and walking back to my apartment for more drinking and making friends with people who walked past my front steps as we smoked like the rebels we are. i drank much more than i should have.
tuesday i was so sick. i couldn't drink water for fear of throwing up= always a fun thing. thats what i get for excessive amounts of champagne and wine. and i mean excessive. but it was still fun and i survived. and tonight amy and i went back to philly and saw the screwtape letters, a production at the lantern theater company for which jessica was the costume designer - her first professional outing! i'm so proud of her- for reals.

this weekend ought to be interesting.
once i have a clue whats going on i might write, but i may just wait til whatever happens does so. that way... yeah
anyways.
i've been thinking about the future.
i know people are consistently doing that but i've been thinking in terms of career and what i really want to be and to do and how i can establish myself.
i want to be a writer. not of the crap thats on here but of theater. i love characters and theater and playwriting and everything. it what i'm really in school for right now. its the reason i got into uarts i think- because i definitely did not get in on my technical theater prowess or my knowledge of stage management practices. because i have no experience in either of those fields. and the only thing i presented at my interview with amy were scripts. one finished one act play, 3 scenes of an unfinished crappy jukebox musical of sort(but not really), 5 scenes of an unfinished play from class, and 4 monologues from a newer idea i had been working on at the time based on the post secret art project. but i've been thinking. if this is really what i want to do i need to apply myself. i really need to get some follow through with my writing. i need to work my ass off and try to finish what i start instead of beginning a bunch of pieces and never finishing them. and i need to think in terms of my education.

once i'm finished at uarts in my shorter amount of time (since thats what i'm working towards) i think i want to go to tisch. yes, its expensive. yes, its hard to get into. and yes, i have no idea if thats even going to be what i want in a few years. but at the moment i do want to write theater. i want to work in that field and i want to go to one of the best places to study it, in one of the most incredible cities in the world.

NYU/TISCH Musical theater writing program.

thats it. i want to go for book writing. maybe lyric writing depending on where i can get with that and how much i can grow in the next year or so. but thats it.

i don't make new years resolutions. people never keep them and things change as time goes on making a resolution made in january not pertinent by the time march rolls around. but i think i want to develop my writing. i want to work, privately on my writing and i want to grow with it. i want to be better than i have been. i want to be good. and i want to finish something and truly be proud of my work, not read it once its done and think "what kind of crap am i churning out?" like i usually think.

thats all.
i got a bit ranty but i think thats really going to be my goal over the year, in addition to keeping my grades where they are (gpa was 3.82 this semester, thank you very much)